Friday, June 24, 2022

Welcome to Murica

Imagine, if you will, living in the alternate timeline created by a single diverging event, one that happened in November 2016 – the timeline where Donald Jackass Trump wasn’t elected president and didn’t have the opportunity to shove the fanatical Republican agenda down everyone’s throat in an effort to take control of anyone who’s not a straight white “Christian” male. Yes, that’s right, I put quotation marks around the word “Christian.” 

If my opening paragraph didn’t make you immediately stop reading, I want you to imagine that alternate timeline marching progressively forward, rather than regressing back to the oppressive Dark Ages, where a Pro Life movement really is about advocating for the life of a child rather than about controlling women.

By overturning Roe v. Wade, those Supreme Court justices made it next to impossible for me to be proud of what’s become a perverse version of our country, one that’s been unofficially renamed Murica. In the timeline we do live in, assault rifles protect the Confederate flag and kill innocent children. Women, people of color, the elderly, and the LGBTQ+ community have no value in the eyes of the straight white “Christian” male population, and therefore they routinely get disrespected, disregarded, and dismissed.


Why should men who don’t know the function of a clitoris, or even know how to find one, be allowed to make rules that govern a woman’s body? 

Yes, there are cultures where men are so well-aware of the purpose of a woman’s clitoris, but they use that knowledge to mutilate young girls as they come of age. The objective of these “ritual surgeries” is to make sure those poor girls will never know the joy of an orgasm for the rest of their lives. Without orgasms, they will never stray and will remain faithful to their husbands. That’s fear. That’s control.

Now, all you men out there, imagine having mandatory castrations performed when you hit puberty. Or maybe you’re allowed to keep your testicles until after you’ve sired one or two children, ensuring that you’ll remain faithful to your wife for the rest of your life.

Why do humans in power create rules and use religion or their political party as a crutch to justify them? All they’re doing is creating rules that selfishly protect their own beliefs, their own interests, and their own money. The wealthy citizens have the power. But who has most of the money? The straight white “Christian” male population? What threatens that power, that money? Everyone else.

Why are lobbyists and organized religions allowed to influence government at all?

Why can’t women make rules governing men’s bodies?

If women could be jailed for having an abortion because it’s considered murder and therefore illegal, then it stands to reason that every man who ejaculates and wastes his sperm during masturbation should be thrown in jail as well for ending a life before it had the chance to begin. That’s murder, right? 

If women can be forced to give birth to an unwanted pregnancy, men should be forced to get vasectomies to prevent those unwanted pregnancies in the first place. Then those men should have to pass rigorous tests to prove they’re capable of being a responsible parent before they’re allowed to have the procedure reversed. If a man fails to pass such a test but reverses his vasectomy anyway, he should be thrown in jail for recklessness and malicious intent to overpopulate the world. 

Those lawbreakers should also be forced to make financial restitution for causing physical and emotional distress to any woman he impregnates as a result. In fact, illegally reversing a mandated vasectomy should be introduced as a new sin in all religions. Write a new “New Testament” that includes public shaming, shunning, and even stoning those horrible sinners.

My point is that different groups want different things. The ones in power are ultimately the weakest links in the humanity chain, living such fearful lives that they think the only way to protect their “values” is to step all over everyone else’s. We all think we’re right, but we all can’t be right. 

And I will clarify that not all straight white Christian males are guilty of being dicks.

So, my message to all you straight white “Christian” males who are trying to force your overly zealous beliefs on the world and women everywhere:  Stay the hell out of our vaginas.

My message to everyone else who would like to stop this insanity:  VOTE! 


#MyBody  #Freedom  #ProChoice  #RoeVsWade  #Vote  #FakeProLife  #ForcedVasectomies


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